WISE WHISPER

LIFE IS IN STAGES ; BLESSINGS ARE IN TIMINGS; OPPORTUNITIES ARE TIED WITH DEADLINES BUT DREAMS ARE BOUNDLESS!





Monday, 1 March 2010

THE SOUR GRAPES ATTITUDE

As you can see from the narrative picture below, the sour grapes attitude sulks. It is a nasty attitude that must be eschewed and not nurtured.

The idiomatic meaning of sour grapes is to decide that the attainment of something you have desired or unsuccessfully attempted to acquire or attain, is not worth it after all , and even possibly inferior in quality. Sour grapes is an attitude that constantly puts down or expresses a feigned disdain about everything that  is desired but not attained. A person with a sour grapes attitude will deny the desirability of anything she cannot have. If you wear a nice dress which she wishes she could also have but is unable to buy, she will say all sorts of unpleasant things about the dress for you to feel it is actually not a nice one.

The sour grapes attitude likes to pass disparaging remarks about positive strides attained by others. If anything good is not to their credit, it is not good enough. If they lost in a contest, the rewarding prize in their opinion is undesirable. For instance if there is a $1000 prize for the winner of a contest they participated in and lost, they will pass a comment like -' I didn't even want to win. The prize is demeaning - only $1000.'



The sour grapes attitude is full of envy.  A person full of sour grapes cannot rejoice with others. Everything good must be theirs. If they long to marry, and you get married before they do, they will have all sorts of nasty things to say about your marriage - that your husband is not handsome enough; that your wedding ceremony or wedding ring was below standard. And so on and so forth.This reiterates the old Persian saying that: "The cat who cannot reach the meat says it stinks!” 



The term sour grapes is derived from one of Aesop's fables . A fox tries many times to pluck some grapes that dangle invitingly over his head, but he cannot reach them. As he slinks away in disgust, he says, “Those grapes are probably sour anyway.” To the fox in the fable, whatever he cannot have is otherwise not good. This indeed is a bitter attitude. To the individual full of sour grapes, what he has tried to attain but was unsuccessful, must not be attained by any other. He will belittle anything he cannot or does not have.

Do you always appear bitter about the good achievements of others? Are you fond of passing degrading and cynical remarks about what others have, especially when you secretly wish for the same things? If you simply cannot say 'well done' to your fellow, or admit the admirable and laudable achievements of others. If you are unable to handle your loss in a dignified manner but rather scornfully despise another's triumph, you are full of sour grapes and your attitude sulks. So please, kindly get off your high horse and clean up your envious heart.





Written by Gina Bello

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2 comments:

I know people with the above attitude, but never understood why they acted so. You have shed much light on it, and brought home its root cause, which is envy! Thanks

You are welcome Chloe, envy is very destructive, and must be eschewed.

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